If “Reality is a thing of the Past”, is this the Future of Sex?

If you live under a rock and don’t know what The Matrix is, here is a brief synopsis: Computer-hacker Thomas Anderson (Neo) discovers that life on Earth is nothing more than an elaborate façade created by cyber-intelligence for the purpose of placating us while our life essence is “farmed” to fuel the Matrix’s campaign of domination in the “real world”. Neo (Keanu Reeves) joins rebel warriors Morpheus (Laurence Fishburne) and Trinity (Carrie Ann Moss) in a struggle to overthrow the Matrix.

Since there is really only one main male character, and one main female character, they simply must fall in love; it's mainstream movie algebra. Neo and Trinity finally have sex (in Matrix Revolutions) in their cave-like bedroom that is lit with enough candles to fill a shrine (watch the scene below). Slow-motion, extra-zoomed-in clips of kissing takes the focus off the fact that their bodies are covered with little metal holes (giving way to more sexual possibilities?) and of course the sex is so hot that she has to do the sex scene trademark of clawing her fingernails into him.

In the midst of the two cyberfreaks getting it on, scenes of a rave orgy cut in and out, where sweaty half-naked couples dance and grind with each other in celebration, and six foot tall black men jump (what seems to be) 20 feet in the air as part of some sort of strange dance move (if someone tried that in a club today, they would either get beaten up, made fun of, or thrown out). The sweaty skin clips of the famous couple are mixed in with the skin-filled clips of random party-goers' random body parts (toned and sexy, of course—because everyone in the Matrix has all the time in the world to tone and sculpt their beautiful bodies – just like all the people in 300 *eyeroll*).

The pulsing music with a strong backbeat gives the feeling of a racing, throbbing heartbeat that’s in tune with each lustful thrust (like Neo cares that he is missing the party – he’s getting lucky, damn it). Then suddenly, they stop, the music slows, they look longingly into each others eyes, and … we get the image of Trinity falling to her death (well, certain sexual occurrences are called “little deaths”, aren’t they? Well played, Wachowski brothers).

So, what’s the deal with all the sexiness in a movie whose premise is that we can transcend our bodies using computers? After all, most of us went to see it for another taste of a virtual world where Neo flies, Trinity leaps across buildings in a single bound, and Morpheus battles albino bodygaurds who can dematerialize at will.

Does this scene show a juxtaposition of the hedonism of Zion with the truly pure love of a hero, or does the scene come off as compleltey irrelevant, rediculous, and un-sexy, and manage to undermine the hero and cheapen the film’s entire purpose?

Is the sex in this movie a radical statement of multiracial, multipartner, out-of-wedlock sex that for once doesn’t spell doom for its participants, or does it seem like it is simply placed in the film for Matix nerds to gawk at a glimpse of skin in order to fulfil the media’s need to sell sex?

Why Crash conquered the Mountain

Although I have personally tried my very best to avoid watching Brokeback Mountain, I figured that because it was such a controversial mainstream movie, I ought to explore the impact of this type of sexuality within the film industry. I had no idea the plethora of information I was about to get myself into, but for the sake of this blog, I trudged my way through article after article to get a feel for how this affected the American audience.

If you didn’t already know, Crash beat out Brokeback Mountain for the 2006 Academy Award for Best Picture. The fan favorite (Brokeback Mountain [Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger] ) about a 20 year long gay love affair was highly favored to win, and the audience was in shock and awe when the movie taking a racial stance won out.

Regarding this night, this gay news blog stated that; “In one wild moment, the whole evening turned around, ripping through the show's complacency and probably spoiling a lot of instant think-pieces already half-composed about "Brokeback's" gutsy reversal of America's sexual-cultural mythos.”

The good news: In a movie that is 130 minutes long, 129 of them are male kissing/male sex free. So yes, maybe it will be the longest almost 60-seconds of your life, but the rest of the film is intense longing and sadness of a doomed love. The sex scene is described by Roger Ebert as “sudden” and “almost violent”. It takes place in a tent after a night of drinking, and contains more shoving and pushing each other away than tenderness or kissing. I don’t feel the need to get into the specifics, that’s not the point of this particular blog, but if I had to group the scene into one of my “categories” (of either being 1) uncomfortable, 2) awkward, 3) unrealistic, or 4) simply put in movies to make money off selling sex) I would have to say it was just awkward (and unnecessary to be quite honest) probably more for males than females (simply because females are more accepting of the idea of expressing forbidden love (be it gay or straight), not because men are homophobic). Ebert says; “Brokeback Mountain” has been described as "a gay cowboy movie," which is a cruel simplification. It is the story of a time and place where two men are forced to deny the only great passion either one will ever feel. Their tragedy is universal. …Strange but true: The more specific a film is, the more universal, because the more it understands individual characters, the more it applies to everyone. I can imagine someone weeping at this film, identifying with it, because he always wanted to stay in the Marines, or be an artist or a cabinetmaker.”

Yet, Crash still won the Oscar.

Michael Wilmington, a movie critic for the Chicago Tribune, wrote; “Crash probably won because more of the academy voters liked and admired it as a movie. They didn't shun “Brokeback”; they gave it three key Oscars (best director, adapted screenplay and original score) and a strong place in academy history. But I would argue that the majority -- and maybe it was a slim majority -- honestly preferred "Crash." In the end, it's more likely that the voting majority thought "Brokeback" was a good, honorable film, but slower, less engrossing and less moving compared with the jazzy, multistranded, Altmanesque L.A.-contempo "Crash," a movie about racism and crime in today's Los Angeles with a big-name ensemble cast playing for peanuts, a tricky structure of interweaving stories and an overall L.A. atmosphere and feeling that struck many Angelenos as right-on."

I agree that Brokeback is slower, less engrossing, and less moving than Crash, because many parts in Crash left me with my hand over my mouth, eyes wide open and loving the film. The scene that most stuck with me, however, was the physical abuse cavity search from the white police officer (Matt Dillon) to the upper-class black women (Thandie Newton) where she is basically “hand raped” by an officer while her husband stands by and watches her get “finger-fucked” in fear of the gun-holding policemen. The actress explains here why she is still outraged by the whole scene (watch it here).

In the midst of a racially interlocking story of whites, blacks, Latinos, Koreans, Iranians, cops and criminals, the rich and the poor, the powerful and powerless, who are all defined in one way or another by racism, this rape scene is thrown in to show racial discrimination as well as unnecessary physical violence in a situation that forces you to think about what you would have done if this happened to you. It is interesting how well-received this movie was with blatent scenes of racism and violence, but Roger Ebert explains why he thinks this is; “Not many films have the possibility of making their audiences better people. I don't expect "Crash" to work any miracles, but I believe anyone seeing it is likely to be moved to have a little more sympathy for people not like themselves….You may have to look hard to see it, but "Crash" is a film about progress.”

I agree that this film moves viewers forward more than Brokeback does, but then why was the win such an upset?

Why all the criticism saying that American wasn’t ready for homosexual sex scenes, yet a movie with racism, violence, sexual abuse and discrimination is not only fine with the American public, but glorified for the possibilities it can bring to society?

Is there a problem with this, or have we gotten so used to seeing this type of violence, we are immune to it in a way that is destructive?

With all its commercial success, along with all the comedic bashing surrounding Brokeback, do you think America was ready for this type of mainstream homosexuality, or was it simply a ploy to try to make American think they were ready for something so obviously controversial?

"Wild"ly Surprising...

In an attempt to get back to raunchier mainstream movies filled with porn-like sex scenes and nakedness at every turn, I asked my boyfriend’s roommates for this week’s pick and after much deliberation, they suggested Wild Things. What a fabulously trashy choice, boys. Good Work.

Synopsis: Sam Lombardo is a well-respected Florida high school guidance councilor who gets his life turned upside down when two students, spoiled rich-girl Kelly Van Ryan (Denise), and trailer-trash bad-girl Suzie Toller (Neve), bring rape charges against him in which local police detective Ray Duquette investigates the allegations. But not everything is what it appears to be and the big question arises: Who is deceiving who?

Instead of reviewing the movie, however, I thought it would fun to review someone else’s critique on the movie, since many movie reviews found they had something to say about this lovely piece of fiction. First, Rob Blackwelder of Spicedonline.com was pleasantly surprised regarding his own enjoyment of this film.

He describes it “A whodunit with a ‘90s mentality, it has back stabbing conspirators, a bi-sexual love triangle and teenage temptresses claiming rape. It’s moderately entertaining trash that turns crafty in the last reel when it is finally called on to explain itself. But until then, the only (cheap) thrill comes courtesy of Denise Richards, … and the wet T-shirt she sports while coming on to her high school guidance counselor”. It is true, this movie relentlessly tries to throw in a sexy car wash scene, tight and exposing clothing and shower scenes (ahh the infamous shower scene..) wherever and whenever possible. Blackwelder feels that “With more explicit sex scenes and smaller stars it could be a feature on the Playboy Channel.” I totally agree. This is definitely not something you want to get catch watching by your mom at three in the morning. File this under “guilty pleasure”.

He also says that it is unnecessarily complex, but not clever, and is more sex than mystery. “Richards’ body is on display throughout, Campbell’s contract had a no-nudity clause, but she comes awful close, and even [Kevin] Bacon goes full frontal in a late scene that leads the audience to momentarily expect some boy-boy hanky-panky to balance Richards-Campbell saphic pow-wow earlier in the movie.” The famous bitch-fight sex scene in the pool (featured below thanks to YouTube) is idealized in the film industry as one of the best girl-on-girl sex scene, complete with bitch slap after bitch slap, and ending with both of them topless in the pool (with a peeping tom recording it from the bushes). The blatant attempt at sexuality (watch this scene) makes this movie only earn 2 ½ stars, however, it does do one ingenious thing that makes it worth a rental—the closing credits are accompanied with out-takes that fill in the story’s holes. “This flash of creativity made me decide at the last minute that I liked the picture in spite of myself.”

Reviewer James Brundage (article) of ContactMusic.com wraps up this movie perfectly:
“Hands down, Wild Things is the most guilt-inducing guilty pleasure movie that I have ever watched… until you get to the end. When you do get to the end, you realize that, as sleazy of a film as Wild Things is, it is actually a brilliantly concocted, Hitchcock-with-a-hard-on, mystery thriller.” Hitchcock-with-a-hard-on… I couldn’t have put it better myself.

"Wild Things" Bitch Fight/Sex Scene

Denise Richards and Neve Campbell have a way of fighting, and then making out..i mean, up. ;)

Shower...If You Dare...

I know Halloween has come and past, but in the spirit of the season, I thought I would focus on sexuality within horror films. Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays because everything seems a little creepier; every rustle of the leaves, every graveyard you pass, every ax murderer in the shower…wait…that’s only in horror movies. What is it about horror films always containing a shower scene? Is it because you are more vulnerable to be killed when naked and in the shower? Or is a simply a ploy to somehow add in nudity and the sex appeal of the shower into a movie where most people just want to see someone’s head get chopped off?

Thanks to a little movie called Scream, (one of the highest grossing films in 1996) we all have detailed rules of How to Successfully Survive a Horror Movie (watch the scene).

Those rules are:
1.You may not survive the movie if you have sex.
2.You may not survive the movie if you drink or do drugs.
3.You may not survive the movie if you say "I'll be right back."
Click Here for even more rules.

It is interesting that if you are not a virgin, you will die in the movie. Sex = death. That’s some several morality teaching right there. It reminds me of the Victorian notion that women who have sex ("the fallen woman") must die. This notion of mixing sex with death is sinister but somewhat overseen in film. Why are these two things grouped together? This brings us back to the idea of the shower scene.
Psycho’s famous shower scene was among the first to show a naked women being murdered in the shower. The scene doesn’t actually show ..anything, really (ahh Hitchcock..) but is still mixing the idea of sex (naked and vulnerable) with violence and death. Friday the 13th is another example of two lovebirds getting it on the shower, and then as soon as she leaves, he’s murdered. (Watch the scene)

Newer horror movies feel like throwing some sexy shower scenes in for no apparent reason other than to show the heartthrob of the week getting naked and engaging in steamy sex. (Think this scene from The Fog, or this scene from The Skulls)

My favorite horror scene is probably the ending scene from I Know What You Did Last Summer. Who doesn’t want to see Jennifer Love Hewitt in a towel? Those creepy words “I Still Know” written on the shower wall, and then…– well, just do yourself a favor and watch the scene.

So, what is the facination with adding sex into a blood bath movie? You’re expecting one thing, and then BAM! a random (usually pointless) sex scene or a naked shower sequence pops up and you’re thinking, “Who’s gunna die in the shower this week”? I found that most horror flicks with the random sex scenes fall into the category of “only put there to show skin in the commercial/trailer” and are usually uncomfortable because you are either a) waiting for someone to be killed or b) wondering what the point of this is if someone has not been killed yet.

All in all, most of the time sex in horror films are used as (SHOCKER!) just another ploy to sell movies, or to add more sex appeal to another teen box-office hit.

This does however give us (yet) another form of sex and violence. Should we be considering how sex and violence is portrayed in the media when thinking about how high sexual abuse, murder and rape statistics have become over the last decade? How big of an effect does the media have over our lives?

Think about how many images of violent sex, sexual abuse or rape you have seen within movies or on television.

Is this number too high?

Is there probable cause to think there is a link between these images portrayed in the media and rape/murder statistics?

Top Three Worst "Love" Scenes

After a few months of looking up “sex scenes” in the film industry on the internet, I realized that I was getting the same thing over and over, but not always exactly what I wanted. Then I realized that “love scenes” got waayyy more hits than “sex scenes” (unless you’re looking for porn). Why do we call scenes that are full of sex between people who don’t really love each other “love scenes”? I figured it was coined from the term “making love”, which apparently took on its modern connotation only in the middle of the 20th century. (The Oxford English Dictionary lists the first quotation for it’s definition of “make love,” as “to copulate” from 1950.)

So, upon typing in “love scenes” and opening up a whole new world of blogging opportunities, today’s post will focus on five incredibly BAD “LOVE” (sex) SCENES just for fun, and because the weather’s bad, and I’m sick, making me feel miserable and thus more able to rip on terrible movies with even worse sex scenes.
From Maxim’s 10 Worst Love Scenes of All Time, I picked my top 3:

3. Gigli
"Love"birds: Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez
Maxim said : “Leave it to “Bennifer” to ruin every man’s fantasy of being able to lure a hot lesbian onto “Team Hetero”. This is so true. The cheesy music mixed with Ben’s half-stoned look made for this scene to be almost as bad as this movie’s reviews. As they both scrambled to make people forget about this massive box-offive let-down, they also scrambled to get out of this relationship. No wonder Ben ran into the arms of Jennifer Garner. Maybe she didn’t make his eyes glaze over during sex.

2. National Lampoon’s Van Wilder
"Love"birds: Ryan Reynolds and Cynthia Fancher
Pairing someone as hot as Ryan Reynolds with someone as old, toothless and hairless as the elderly “seducer” in this scene, should be illegal. You can almost smell the mixture of whiskey, denture cream and old person sweat. No one wants to see someone that old licking her lips and saying, “Shut up, Bitch, and give me some sugar”. That woman whipping her hair off is the definition of not sexy. Poor, Ryan.

1. The Shining
"Love"birds: Jack Nicholson and Lia Beldam/Billie Gibson
The only thing worse than watching Jack Nicholson making out with someone is watching the naked women he is making out with turn into a mold-and-sore infested grandma. The creepy music and octogenarian in the bathtub makes this scene so incredibly…terrible. This movie gave children nightmares for more reasons that "Heeere's Johnny"...


Honorable Mention: Nip/Tuck
"Love"birds: Julian McMahon and Rosie O’Donnell
Even though this is a TV series, not a movie, I thought this deserved honorable mention simply because of the sheer horror it brought to anyone who had to watch it. Rosie couldn’t even keep her huge mouth shut through her very expensive ten minutes with Julian, telling him about Brit and K-Fed, among other things. And nothing is worse than asking the question, “Are you all the way in?” Horrified to the very core…

So what is the purpose of these terrible sex scenes? Everything from horrifying images in a horror film, to horrifying images in a comedic setting, bad "love" scenes are all over television and movies. Is it simply for the effect that sex sells, or is it something more? Do people enjoy watching sex scenes in horror films? Do audiences like cringing at uncomfortable (and usually amusing) terrible sex scenes?

Especially in horror films (as we just past Halloween), is there a certain element of thrill and fear in including sex into horror films? Are the scenes usually forced sex or sweet sex? This seems like the making of my next post...